You can do this. You can disclose with composure, with dignity, with confidence. Before you do, though, remember who you were before your diagnosis. You are the same wonderful, vibrant, deserving person. Forgive yourself for what has happened, whether you were careless or cautious, used protection or did not, had a one-night stand or you received from a long-term partner. You have herpes now. It is what it is, as my grandfather always said. Your disposition about your diagnosis will determine how others react to your disclosure. It may not feel okay right now, but it will be. Your new normal may be uncomfortable, awkward, and unpleasant at times, but you will persevere and prosper. Disclosing is scary. Start with a stranger, a tinder date, or a random guy/girl at the bar, but get that first disclosure out of the way. It may be teary or angry, but with practice, you'll find you can do it. You may also find this is your opportunity to wait until you find the man/woman that is worth pouring your heart out to. Herpes does not define you. You've got this. You have herpes and you're fucking fabulous. When you love yourself first, you are unstoppable. When you forgive the past, your future will open up before you. If you need practice, tell me your story at firstname.lastname@example.org.